Question: What was the name of the tanker that spilled 11 million gallons of crude oil off the coast of Alaska?
Last Question: In iThree Amigos!, who played the title characters?
Answer: Chevy Chase, Steve Martin and Martin Short
The Three Amigos were Lucky Day (Steve Martin), Dusty Bottoms (Chevy Chase), and Ned Nederlander (Martin Short). They were silent film actors who were fired when they demanded a salary increase. They received a letter of distress from Santo Poco, a Mexican village that was being bullied by the notorius bandit El Guapo (Alfonso Arau). The message was sent by Carmen, the daughter of the village leader, who believed the Three Amigos were real heroes. And the Three Amigos misinterpreted the message, believing that it was an invitation to make a film with El Guapo.
The Amigos find out the hard way that this was real, and run off in disgrace. But, with nothing waiting for them back home, Ned persuades Lucky and Dusty to become real-life heroes and go after El Guapo.
They go back to Santo Poco, and help teach the people to stand up for themselves. The Three Amigos and the villagers defeat El Guapo and his men. The villagers offer to give the Amigos all the money they have, but the Amigos refuse it, saying (as in their movies) that seeing justice done is enough of a reward for them. They then ride off into the sunset, ready to continue being real heroes.
Here are some quotes from the movie:
Lucky: I’ll come back some day.
Carmen: I like the one who is not so smart.
Other girl: Which one is that?
El Guapo: What? Are gringos falling from the sky?
[Ned falls to the ground]
Jefe: Yes, El Guapo.
Lucky: Not so fast, El Guapo! Or I’ll fill you so full of lead that you’ll be using your dick for a pencil!
El Guapo: What do you mean?
Lucky: I don’t know.
Jefe: I think he means that if you –
El Guapo: SHUT UP!
Jefe: We have many beautiful piñatas for your birthday celebration, each one filled with little surprises!
El Guapo: How many piñatas?
Jefe: Many piñatas, many!
El Guapo: Jefe, would you say I have a plethora of piñatas?
Jefe: A what?
El Guapo: A plethora.
Jefe: Oh yes, El Guapo. You have a plethora.
El Guapo: Jefe, what is a plethora?
Jefe: Why, El Guapo?
El Guapo: Well, you just told me that I had a plethora, and I would just like to know if you know what it means to have a plethora. I would not like to think that someone would tell someone else he has a plethora, and then find out that that person has no idea what it means to have a plethora.
Jefe: El Guapo, I know that I, Jefe, do not have your superior intellect and education, but could it be that once again, you are angry at something else, and are looking to take it out on me?
Dusty Bottoms: Time for plan B. Plan A was to break into El Guapo’s fortress.
Carmen: And that you have done, now what?
Dusty Bottoms: Well we really dont have a plan B. We didn’t expect for the first plan to work. Sometimes you can overplan these things.
Rosita: [El Guapo has kidnapped Carmen and taken her to his fortress] Carmen, tonight you are to be El Guapo’s woman. I am going to give you some hints about lovemaking with El Guapo.
Carmen: I would rather die first!
Rosita: Tell me, Carmen, do you know what foreplay is?
Carmen: [Carmen shakes her head, trembling slightly with fear] No…
Rosita: Good! Neither does El Guapo.
[Dusty Bottoms and Lucky Day thinks Ned Nederlander is saying “mail” plane]
Dusty Bottoms: What is it doing here?
Ned Nederlander: I think it’s a male plane.
Dusty Bottoms: How can you tell?
Ned Nederlander: Didn’t you notice its little balls?
Lucky Day: In a way, all of us has an El Guapo to face. For some, shyness might be their El Guapo. For others, a lack of education might be their El Guapo. For us, El Guapo is a big, dangerous man who wants to kill us. But as sure as my name is Lucky Day, the people of Santa Poco can conquer their own personal El Guapo, who also happens to be *the actual* El Guapo!
Lucky Day: Wherever there is injustice, you will find us.
Ned Nederlander: Wherever there is suffering, we’ll be there.
Dusty Bottoms: Wherever liberty is threatened, you will find…
Lucky Day, Ned Nederlander, Dusty Bottoms: The Three Amigos!
And here a couple of classic scenes: