Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Holy Jesus! What is that? What the fuck is that? WHAT IS THAT, PRIVATE PYLE?
Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, a jelly doughnut, sir!
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: A jelly doughnut?
Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, yes, sir!
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: How did it get here?
Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, I took it from the mess hall, sir!
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Is chow allowed in the barracks, Private Pyle?
Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, no, sir!
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Are you allowed to eat jelly doughnuts, Private Pyle?
Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, no, sir!
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: And why not, Private Pyle?
Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, because I’m too heavy, sir!
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Because you are a disgusting fat body, Private Pyle!
Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, yes, sir!
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Then why did you try to sneak a jelly doughnut in your footlocker, Private Pyle?
Private Gomer Pyle: Sir, because I was hungry, sir!
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Because you were hungry…
[turns and addresses rest of platoon]
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Private Pyle has dishonored himself and dishonored the platoon. I have tried to help him. But I have failed. I have failed because YOU have not helped me. YOU people have not given Private Pyle the proper motivation! So, from now on, whenever Private Pyle fucks up, I will not punish him! I will punish all of YOU! And the way I see it ladies, you owe me for ONE JELLY DOUGHNUT! NOW GET ON YOUR FACES!
[rest of recruits get in front-leaning-rest position, Hartman turns to Pyle]
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Open your mouth!
[shoves jelly doughnut into PYLE’s mouth]
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: They’re payin’ for it; YOU eat it! Ready! Exercise!
Happy 56th Birthday to Vincent D’Onofrio!!!
[twitter-follow screen_name=’returntothe80s’ show_count=’yes’ text_color=’00ccff’]
If you follow me on Twitter or on Facebook, you may know that I had the pleasure of attending a 30th anniversary screening of The Goonies this past Saturday (June 27, 2015). What made it even more special was that the star of the movie, Sean Astin, was there and he did a Q&A session after the movie.
I didn’t even know about the event until earlier in the week when I happened to catch a Tweet about it by my friend Ken Reid of the TV Guidance Counselor Podcast. He announced that he was hosting the screening and Q&A in Worcester, Massachusetts, which is only about an hour from my house. I actually did not have anything scheduled that night, so I just had to be there.
It was a great time. I had never watched a movie in a venue like that. This event was at Mechanics Hall, which I believe is a place where you watch symphonies. It was a big open room with individual chairs lined up next to each other. The padding on them was really good, so it was a couple of steps above metal folding chairs. The screen was hanging from the ceiling, and the blu-ray version of the movie was projected on the screen.
It was so much fun watching a classic movie like this with so many people that are into it as much as you are! The only down side of this experience was that the sound was not very good. It was loud, but I couldn’t understand most of the dialog. But, that was not much of a problem since I already know the movie pretty well. The movie ended with thunderous applause. The only time I remember an applause at a movie was when Star Wars was re-released in the theaters in the ’90s, and when “A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away” appeared on the screen at the beginning of The Phantom Menace.
The Q&A was outstanding too. Ken did a great job with the interview, and Sean was a lot of fun. There a few fun facts I took away from the interview. He did not appreciate the fat jokes at Jeff “Chunk” Cohen’s expense. He doesn’t blast people for liking it, but he just did not like those jokes. And I agree 1,000%. I thought the Truffle Shuffle was stupid and there was no reason for it, other than to make a fool out of Chunk. It also reminds me of the fat jokes that were made on Growing Pains about Carol (Tracey Gold) – who was NOT EVEN FAT – and led to her having an eating disorder. Anyway, after filming ended for The Goonies, director Richard Donner got Jeff Cohen a nutritionist, and made sure he would be ok. Jeff is now an entertainment lawyer, and is in great shape.
Sean was a little starstruck when he met Ke Huy Quan (Data), as he had just been in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom a year earlier. All the kids became good friends.
I am definitely going to have to watch the movie again soon. Sean mentioned that it a woman did his stunts. When they are going down the slide, and when you see him flipping over, and you can’t see his face, that was the stunt woman that you see. And there are some scenes where you only see his hands. Well, Sean said that his hands were prettier in those scenes, hinting that it was a stunt woman doing that.
In the DVD version of the movie that I own, there is an octopus in the climactic scene. I believe this was also on the television version. Well, it was not in the original theatrical release, and was not in this version that we just watched. Sean was not a big fan of filming that scene.
Sean left right after this event. I did catch up with Ken Reid, and he told me that Sean was running in a half marathon the next morning. This race was in my hometown! The weather was really horrible, so I was not motivated to go down and watch. I just think that is so cool that he is so down-to-earth.
Ken was telling me that there had been a screening like this for Blade Runner followed by a Q&A with Joanna Cassidy, but there was hardly anybody there. I’ll keep my eye out for more of these, and report back to you guys. And Mechanics Hall better step up and promote this stuff better!
Check out Ken Reid’s TV Guidance Counselor podcast. There are a lot of episodes that cover a week in the ’80s, and early ’90s. He always has great guests, and is a very good interviewer.
And for the record, The Goonies ‘R’ Good Enough for me!
Francis Fratelli: Tell us everything! Everything! Chunk: Everything. OK! I’ll talk! In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max’s toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog… when my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out… but the worst thing I ever done – I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa – and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life. Jake Fratelli: [amused] I’m beginning to like this kid, Ma! Mama Fratelli: [tired of Chunk’s stalling] Hit puree!
Michael: There’s something I’ve got to tell you. Michael’s Girl: Yes, Michael? Michael: I’m not like other guys. Michael’s Girl: Of course you’re not. That’s why I love you. Michael: No, I mean I’m different. Michael’s Girl: What are you talking about?
It was six years ago today that Michael Jackson died.