[at a meeting with the assistant principal, who’s got a big unsightly growth on her face]

Anita: I’m Anita Hoargarth.

Buck Russell: [Staring at it] I’m Buck Melanoma. Moley Russell’s wart. Not her wart. Not her wart! I’m… I’m the wart. She’s my tumor. My… my growth. My… uh, my pimple. I’m Uncle Wart. Just old Buck “Wart” Russell. That’s what they call me, or Melanoma Head. They’ll call me that. “Melanoma Head’s coming.” I’m s… uncle! Maisy Russell’s uncle!

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