Category Archives: Movies

Quotes of the Day: Michael Caine

In honor of Michael Caine’s 85th birthday today, my good from Gill from RealWeegieMidget Reviews has been hosting a Michael Caine blog-a-thon this week. Several bloggers have been participating this week. Please check out the posts from:

Day 1

Day 2

Day 3

In addition to my contribution with my review of Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, Here is a selection of some of Michael Caine’s quotes from some of his ’80s movie characters.


Sidney Bruhl: I have a name and a reputation! Somewhat tattered, perhaps. But still good for dinner invitations and summer seminars.



Educating Rita

[Frank has just been officially reprimanded for being drunk while giving a lecture]

Dr. Frank Bryant: Sod them, eh, Rita! Sod them!

Rita: Will they sack you?

Dr. Frank Bryant: Good God no. That would involve making a decision. Pissed is all right. To get the sack, it would have to be rape on a grand scale. And not just with students, either. That would only amount to a slight misdemeanour. No, for dismissal it would have to be nothing less than buggering the Bursar.

[Rita discovers Frank packing all his books into crates]

Rita: Have they sacked you?

Dr. Frank Bryant: I made rather a night of it last night so they’re giving me a holiday. Two years in Australia.

Rita: Did you bugger the Bursar?

Dr. Frank Bryant: Metaphorically.

Blame it on Rio

Matthew: One time a company I worked for transferred me to an island in the Pacific. Fantastic place. I invited my girl to visit me. I sent her a postcard everyday with a single word on each card. I wrote “Found a virgin paradise. It’s yours. Matthew.” Narturally, they were delivered in the wrong order. The message she got was “Found a virgin. It’s paradise. Yours, Matthew.” Never heard from her again.

Hannah and Her Sisters

Elliot: God, she’s beautiful. She’s got the prettiest eyes. She looks so sexy in that sweater. I just want to be alone with her and hold her and kiss her and tell her how much I love her and take care of her. Stop it you idiot, she’s your wife’s sister. But I can’t help it. I’m consumed by her. It’s been months now. I dream about her, I – I – I think about her at the office. Oh Lee, what am I gonna do? I hear myself moaning over you and it’s disgusting. Before, when she squeezed past me at the doorway and I smelt that perfume on the back of her neck – Jesus, I – I thought I was gonna swoon. Easy! You’re a dignified financial advisor. It doesn’t look good for you to swoon.

Jaws: The Revenge

Hoagie Newcombe: Bloody Hell! The breath on that thing!




Dirty Rotten Scoundrels

Lawrence Jamieson: Freddy, as a younger man, I was a sculptor, a painter, and a musician. There was just one problem: I wasn’t very good. As a matter of fact, I was dreadful. I finally came to the frustrating conclusion that I had taste and style, but not talent. I knew my limitations. We all have our limitations, Freddy. Fortunately, I discovered that taste and style were commodities that people desired. Freddy, what I am saying is: know your limitations. You are a moron.

Quote of the Day: Beverly Hills Cop II

Sidney Bernstein: [on the phone] Naturally. I can see- Yeah, yeah. I mean I-I understand. Somebody- W-wait-

[off the phone]

Sidney Bernstein: Oh, oh, oh. Come right in. Don’t let the fact that my door’s closed dissuade you in any way from entering my office.

Axel Foley: Sir, we’re with the Beverly Hills Police Department. Are you Mr. Sidney Bernstein?

Sidney Bernstein: Yes. Lucky guess.

Axel Foley: Well, sir, you have 25 unpaid parking tickets, we have a warrant for your arrest.

Sidney Bernstein: 25? What 25?

Axel Foley: You have 25 unpaid parking tickets, sir.

Sidney Bernstein: I-I pay my tickets. I pay – I pay all my tickets.

Axel Foley: Sir, do you own a Black Mercedes-Benz, License Plates number CRL-507?

Sidney Bernstein: 507? That’s my wife’s car! That’s not my car! That’s my-

Axel Foley: You have 25 unpaid parking tickets.

Sidney Bernstein: I mean, it’s under my name. But, it’s my wife’s car! No! No! No!

[picks up phone; yells]

Sidney Bernstein:

Axel Foley: Your tickets have not been paid, that means you’re liable.

[to Taggart & Rosewood]

Axel Foley: Can you cuff Mr. Bernstein, please?

Sidney Bernstein: Cuff me? There are people out there with chainsaws, you’re cuffing me!

Axel Foley: Well, sir, you have 25 unpaid parking tickets, and it’s your car. So, we have to take you in.

Sidney Bernstein: Wait a second, I’ve got an idea. Is there something that I have in this office that I could hand to you, and that would make you kind of forget that you’re holding those, uh, little pink tickets there?

Happy 63rd birthday to Gilbert Gottfried!!!

Quote of the Day: sex, lies, and videotape

Graham: I remember reading somewhere that men learn to love the person that they’re attracted to, and that women become more and more attracted to the person that they love.

Happy 58th birthday to James Spader!!!

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Quote of the Day: Say Anything…

Jim Court: You’re not a permanent part of her life. You’re a distraction.

Lloyd Dobler: I’m the distraction that’s going with her to England, sir.

R.I.P. John Mahoney (June 20, 1940 – February 4, 2018)

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Quote of the Day: This is Spinal Tap

Marty DiBergi: Your first drummer was…
David St. Hubbins: John Stumpy Pepys..great great, tall blond geek with glasses..good drummer great look good drummer….
Marty DiBergi: What happened to him?
David St. Hubbins: He died…he died in a bizarre gardening accident …some years back.
Nigel Tufnel: It was really one of those things – it was – you know the authorities said you know best leave it–unsolved really.
Marty DiBergi: And he was replaced by uh..
Nigel Tufnel: Stumpy Joe…Eric Stumpy Joe Childs.
Marty DiBergi: And what happened to Stumpy Joe?
Derek Smalls: Its not very pleasant story…but uh, he died, uh he choked on uh, the official explanation was he choked on vomit…
Nigel Tufnel: It was actually – it was actually someone else’s vomit…you know there’s no real…
Derek Smalls: Well they can’t prove whose vomit it was…they don’t have the ability…there’s no way of…
Nigel Tufnel: You can’t really dust for vomit…

Happy 70th Birthday to Christopher Guest!!!

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Quote of the Day: Road House

Doc: Your file says you’ve got a degree from NYU. What in?

Dalton: Philosophy.

Doc: Any particular discipline?

Dalton: No. Not really. Man’s search for faith. That sort of shit.

Come up with any answers?

Dalton: Not too many.

Doc: How’s a guy like you end up a bouncer?

Dalton: Just lucky I guess.

Happy 59th Birthday to Kelly Lynch!!!

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Quote of the Day: Field of Dreams

Terence Mann: People will come Ray. The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it’s a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again. Oh… people will come Ray. People will most definitely come.

Happy 87th birthday to James Earl Jones!!!

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Quote of the Day: Glory

Trip: [addressing the 54th the night before battle] I ain’t much about no prayin’, now. I ain’t never had no family, and… killed off my mama. Well, I just… Y’all’s the onliest family I got. I love the 54th. Ain’t even much a matter what happens tomorrow, ’cause we men, ain’t we?

Happy 63rd birthday to Denzel Washington!!!

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