[Terry kisses Rick in front of everybody at the prom]
Rick: [Rick pushes Terry off him and responds] It’s okay, everybody. It’s all right. He has tits.
Just One of the Guys was released 33 years ago today – April 26, 2018
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Tony Montana: Go ahead! I take your fucking bullets! You think you kill me with bullets? I take your fucking bullets! Go ahead!
Happy 78th birthday to Al Pacino!!!
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Wadsworth: The game’s up, Scarlet. There are no more bullets left in that gun.
Miss Scarlet: Oh, come on, you don’t think I’m gonna fall for that old trick?
Wadsworth: It’s not a trick. There was one shot at Mr. Boddy in the Study; two for the chandelier; two at the Lounge door and one for the singing telegram.
Miss Scarlet: That’s not six.
Wadsworth: One plus two plus two plus one.
Miss Scarlet: Uh-uh, there was only one shot that got the chandelier. That’s one plus two plus *one* plus one.
Wadsworth: Even if you were right, that would be one plus one plus two plus one, not one plus *two* plus one plus one.
Miss Scarlet: Okay, fine. One plus two plus one… Shut up! The point is, there is one bullet left in this gun and guess who’s gonna get it!
Happy 72nd Birthday to Tim Curry!!!
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Woman at Party: [coming up to Louis during party] Do you have any Excedrin or extra-strength Tylenol?
Louis: [opening cabinet] Gee, I think all I got is acetylsalicylic acid, generic. See, I can get six hundred tablets of that for the same price as three hundred of a name brand. That makes good financial sense, good advice…
[takes platter back into living room]
Louis: Hey, this is real smoked salmon from Nova Scotia, Canada, $24.95 a pound! It only cost me $14.12 after tax, though.
[walks up to a hapless guest, speaking confidentially]
Louis: I’m givin’ this whole thing as a promotional expense, that’s why I invited clients instead of friends. You havin’ a good time, Mark?
[heads across the room, greeting other guests]
Louis: How you doing? Why don’t you have some of the brie, it’s at room temperature!
[to the Tall Woman]
Louis: You think it’s too warm in here for the brie?
Tall Woman at Party: [standing] Louis, I’m going home.
Louis: Aw, don’t leave yet. Well, listen, maybe if we start dancing other people will join in!
Tall Woman at Party: [pauses] Okay!
[Louis and the Tall Woman begin disco dancing. Suddenly the doorbell rings]
Louis: Oh, don’t move, I just gotta get the door.
[opens door, greeting guests]
Louis: Ted! Annette! I’m glad you could come, how you doin’, give me your coats. Everybody, this is Ted and Annette Fleming! Ted has a small carpet cleaning business in receivership; Annette’s drawing a salary from a deferred bonus from two years ago! They got fifteen thousand left on the house at eight percent.
[throws the guests’ coats in the closet, oblivious that they hit the demon Vinz Clortho hiding there]
Louis: So they’re okay! So, does anybody wanna play Parcheesi?
[Vinz Clortho growls from inside the bedroom]
Louis: [grinning] Okay, who brought the dog?
Happy 65th birthday to Rick Moranis!!!
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Can you name the artist and song:
It’s like a dream, no end and no beginning
You’re here with me, it’s like a dream
Last Song: “Breakin’…There’s No Stopping Us” by Ollie and Jerry from the Breakin’ Soundtrack (1984)
Great job Karen (@dovey_karen) and Kelly (@KellyCiesielski)!!!
Out in the street
You don’t survive by being weak
This is our time
Walls were made for us to climb
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Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: I am Gunnery Sergeant Hartman, your senior drill instructor. From now on you will speak only when spoken to, and the first and last words out of your filthy sewers will be “Sir”. Do you maggots understand that?
Recruits: [In unison in a normal speaking tone] Sir, yes Sir.
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Bullshit I can’t hear you. Sound off like you got a pair!
Recruits: [In unison, much louder] SIR, YES SIR!
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: If you ladies leave my island, if you survive recruit training, you will be a weapon. You will be a minister of death praying for war. But until that day you are pukes. You are the lowest form of life on Earth. You are not even human fucking beings. You are nothing but unorganized grabastic pieces of amphibian shit! Because I am hard, you will not like me. But the more you hate me, the more you will learn. I am hard but I am fair. There is no racial bigotry here. I do not look down on niggers, kikes, wops or greasers. Here you are all equally worthless. And my orders are to weed out all non-hackers who do not pack the gear to serve in my beloved Corps. Do you maggots understand that?
R.I.P. R. Lee Ermey (March 24, 1944 – April 15, 2018)
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You let him drown! You never paid any attention! Look what you did to him. Look what you did to him!
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Happy 66th birthday to Steven Seagal!!!
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There’s something about the ice cream truck that makes kids lose it. And they can hear that shit from ten blocks away. They don’t hear their mothers calling but they hear that motherfucking ice cream truck.
[After Bill Cosby called Eddie to complain about bad language in Eddie’s act]
Richard [Pryor] said, “The next time the motherfucker call, tell him I said, “Suck *my* dick.” I don’t give a fuck. Whatever the fuck make the people laugh, say that shit. Do the people laugh when you say what you say?” I said, “Yes.” He said, “Do you get paid?” I said, “Yes.” He said, “Well, tell Bill I said have a Coke and a smile and shut the fuck up. Jello pudding-eating motherfucker.”
Happy 57th birthday to Eddie Murphy!!!
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Harry Doyle: JUST a bit outside.
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