Billy Ray Valentine: [after breaking a vase] Hey, sorry about that.

Randolph Duke: It’s perfectly all right William. It was your vase.

Billy Ray Valentine: That was a cheap vase, right? That was a fake? Right?

Randolph Duke: I believe we paid $35,000. But if I remember correctly, we valued it for the insurance company at $50,000. You see, Mortimer? William has already made us $15,000.

[Coleman, Mortimer, Randolph, and Billy Ray start laughing]

Billy Ray Valentine: You want me to break something else?

Randolph Duke , Mortimer Duke , Coleman: NO!

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Billy Ray Valentine: [watches Louis clean his shotgun] You know, you can’t just go around and shoot people in the kneecaps with a double-barreled shotgun ’cause you pissed at ’em.
Louis Winthorpe III: Why not?
Billy Ray Valentine: ‘Cause it’s called assault with a deadly weapon, you get 20 years for that shit.
Louis Winthorpe III: Listen, do you have any better ideas?
Billy Ray Valentine: Yeah. You know, it occurs to me that the best way you hurt rich people is by turning them into poor people.
Coleman: You have to admit, sir, you didn’t like it yourself a bit.

Happy 67th birthday to director, John Landis!!!

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