Quotes of the Day: Michael Caine

In honor of Michael Caine’s 85th birthday today, my good from Gill from RealWeegieMidget Reviews has been hosting a Michael Caine blog-a-thon this week. Several bloggers have been participating this week. Please check out the posts from:

Day 1

Day 2

Day 3

In addition to my contribution with my review of Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, Here is a selection of some of Michael Caine’s quotes from some of his ’80s movie characters.


Sidney Bruhl: I have a name and a reputation! Somewhat tattered, perhaps. But still good for dinner invitations and summer seminars.



Educating Rita

[Frank has just been officially reprimanded for being drunk while giving a lecture]

Dr. Frank Bryant: Sod them, eh, Rita! Sod them!

Rita: Will they sack you?

Dr. Frank Bryant: Good God no. That would involve making a decision. Pissed is all right. To get the sack, it would have to be rape on a grand scale. And not just with students, either. That would only amount to a slight misdemeanour. No, for dismissal it would have to be nothing less than buggering the Bursar.

[Rita discovers Frank packing all his books into crates]

Rita: Have they sacked you?

Dr. Frank Bryant: I made rather a night of it last night so they’re giving me a holiday. Two years in Australia.

Rita: Did you bugger the Bursar?

Dr. Frank Bryant: Metaphorically.

Blame it on Rio

Matthew: One time a company I worked for transferred me to an island in the Pacific. Fantastic place. I invited my girl to visit me. I sent her a postcard everyday with a single word on each card. I wrote “Found a virgin paradise. It’s yours. Matthew.” Narturally, they were delivered in the wrong order. The message she got was “Found a virgin. It’s paradise. Yours, Matthew.” Never heard from her again.

Hannah and Her Sisters

Elliot: God, she’s beautiful. She’s got the prettiest eyes. She looks so sexy in that sweater. I just want to be alone with her and hold her and kiss her and tell her how much I love her and take care of her. Stop it you idiot, she’s your wife’s sister. But I can’t help it. I’m consumed by her. It’s been months now. I dream about her, I – I – I think about her at the office. Oh Lee, what am I gonna do? I hear myself moaning over you and it’s disgusting. Before, when she squeezed past me at the doorway and I smelt that perfume on the back of her neck – Jesus, I – I thought I was gonna swoon. Easy! You’re a dignified financial advisor. It doesn’t look good for you to swoon.

Jaws: The Revenge

Hoagie Newcombe: Bloody Hell! The breath on that thing!




Dirty Rotten Scoundrels

Lawrence Jamieson: Freddy, as a younger man, I was a sculptor, a painter, and a musician. There was just one problem: I wasn’t very good. As a matter of fact, I was dreadful. I finally came to the frustrating conclusion that I had taste and style, but not talent. I knew my limitations. We all have our limitations, Freddy. Fortunately, I discovered that taste and style were commodities that people desired. Freddy, what I am saying is: know your limitations. You are a moron.

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